Missing him

I've been in quite the slump the last week, really missing Brian and all that he is to me.  I'm missing my partner, my lover and my best friend.  Brian has been out of Skype range for over a week and a half, not good timing for me missing him.

I've always known that we have that "special" relationship that most people wish for.  Although we've been separated a lot in our almost-11 years of marriage, when he's home, we do pretty much everything together!  We are always sharing our wishes, dreams, failures and obstacles with one another.  It's been hard this week not being able to talk to him about my obstacles.  I haven't been able to share things and for him to be able to listen and give the advise and pep-talk I need.  One truly is a lonely number!  Especially after the kids are in bed and you are having a hard week.  I need my other 1/2.

We've had a busy week at home with me baby-sitting during the day, our local fair in the evenings, and a family wedding this weekend.  All of which, we did without Brian of course.  It's so hard going to different things without Brian.  I always feel like the third wheel, no matter who the company is. -  Ainsley is even starting to feel that way.  She will say things like - it's just not as fun without Daddy is it?  Nope little girl, it's not.  It's so hard to see that others are quick to move on and "get used" to Brian being gone when it's not a part of their every breath.  It hurts and it's scary all at the same time to see how quickly life goes back to normal for some.

Well, enough complaining.  Brian should be back in Skype range in the next day or so - I can hardly wait!!