The last three weekends, I have found myself driving across our beautiful state to visit friends for the weekend. Each time I get all three suitcases packed and loaded in the van, get Ainsley and Brogan's travel bags ready with snacks, water bottles, toys and DVDs to keep them entertained on the 3-5 hour road trips, run through the ATM, and fill up with gas before pulling on interstate to head east. After traveling so many times in my married life - ALONE - I have learned to pack minimally. Now, my husband won't believe this because as soon as he comes home, I revert back to my normal heavy-duty packing, but when I have to carry all the luggage myself, I learn to pack very light.
On the way home last weekend, I looked over at my passenger seat that was filled with a bag of Tootsie Pops, The Wizard of Oz & Pippi Longstocking DVDs, my purse and a few toys that had come sailing my way when Brogan was tired of his car seat. I instantly wanted to be sitting in the passenger's seat. I yearned to have Brian driving the van while I entertain Ainsley and Brogan in the backseat. I'm ready to not only move into the passenger seat on a road trip, but I'm ready to move out of the driver's seat in our family. I'm ready for Brian to "drive" this family and all their decision making. I'm ready to sit back, relax and enjoy the view from the passenger seat and glancing over to catch a sweet smile and wink from my driver! Those are the moments I long for, those are the moments that will be here next fall. And, until then, I will drive.
I remember those days during our past deployment. Just keep remembering your driving is only making you and your family stronger. But I know in the mean time it is hard to play both roles when you are just desperate for your partner to be leading you again. Hang in there sister
ReplyDeleteThank you Coley!! It's a circumstance that only those who have been there can understand.
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